Thursday, June 3, 2010

Spanking with a Feather

Last night I was in South Beach with my good friend Ily. Whenever we are there, we like to have some dinner together, a little wine and - how could one not like it - just talk about all and nothing. It is a great way to just break away from the day-to-day ups and downs.
So we sat down and shared a bottle of Pinot G. and then the strangest thing happened: Ily saw Johnny Depp!
"Where??" I asked her
"There..." pointing at some shrubs across the street. I saw a Latino looking man...
"That's not Johnny Depp... That is Juanito Depp."
"That is Johnny Depp... I tell you"
"He doesn't even look like him"
 "No, no... that is Johnny Depp... trying to disguise that he is Johnny Depp... "
(Wait, wait... there is a logic to it)

"If you were Johnny Depp wouldn't you want to be able to walk around without everybody (read: the screaming herds) following you?" She continued: "So with glasses, a wig and a different walk, nobody would recognize him."
(I told you there is a logic to it)

I could not stop laughing. That man was very, VERY good at not looking like Johnny Depp.  

After we left the restaurant.. we sat down with coffee and my cigarette (get over it... I am A few feet away a man sat down as well to smoke a cigarette... I looked at him and turned to Ily and said:
"Look Ily... There is Mickey Rourke trying not to look like Mickey Rourke..."

And now to the title of this post... "Aaah Finally..." I hear you say. I found that a lot of times people try to out scream each other to have things done. You know the boss that is screaming and bitching, the impatient "Come on" if somebody writes a check at the supermarket, the yelling at the staff if something is not in stock...

You probably all know the expression "You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar". But who want to have flies in their honey? So I changed the expression a little bit and turned it into "Spanking with a feather" and it is all about being persuasive in a sweet gentle flirty way. And it sounds so much better than the flies in the honey thing

Why is it in the title... oh well... it sounds great and for sure it got your attention...


John McElveen said...

You have my VOTE!!!

And Holland--byw---ILY --thinks MORGAN FREEMAN looks like Johnny Depp after vino!!!! LOL

es verdad, si?


aka, Juanny D.- lol

Ily said...

Chica, I should spank you with a wooden spoon for making fun of Johnny! ¡Mala, mala!! :)

Btw, Juanny...Morgan Freeman??! LOL Maybe Samuel L. Jackson, but not Morgan Freeman! :)~

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

LOL, LOL...You are bith so funny...!
I love that Ily saw Johnny Depp--"IN DISGUISDE"....LOL! And your Mickey Roarke 'trying not to look like Mickey Roarke.....LOL!

Personally, I find that each situation dictates whether I am sweet as honey, OR, strong like a Bull! One must size up the situation and then, act accordingly...!

Riot Kitty said...

LOL! I just finished reading Ily's post. You two crack me up. Juanito Depp!

Holland said...

John: Yes, but don't forget... it is Johnny Depp in disguise then... especially after

Ily: ok, I stand corrected. Samuel L. Jackson... trying to look NOT like Johnny Depp... oooh this is getting

Naomi: True... each situation is different, but a lot of people don't even see the differences, they just start screaming and cussing...

Kitty: We thought it was only fair to give both sides of the Johnny Depp affair. lol

Anonymous said...

Wow, Holland! That's an excellent way to put it! Certainly far better than flies in the honey. Now can you find a better saying than "killing 2 birds with one stone"? Who came up with that awful saying???

I really enjoyed this post, with the look-a-likes. Hahaha! My good friend Sylvia and I used to play that game all the time when we'd be sitting at some outdoor cafe, drinking. In fact, the more we drank, the more famous people would pass by! heehee.

Thanks so much for coming by my blog, for your wonderful compliments on my journal pages, and for your good wishes for feeling better!


Granny Annie said...

You are better (wo)men than I. How can you function after sharing a bottle of wine? Just two glasses and I'm seeing Johnny Depp riding the winning hore at the Kentucky Derby.

Fireblossom said...

I always say it as catching more BEES with honey, but I like the spanking with a feather, too!

LL Cool Joe said...

You cracked me up with your smoking comment! Yeah if you are European it's ok to smoke! It's almost expected of you to have a fag hanging out your mouth. Take that as you wish.

I quite often see Elvis, and that's before the bottle of wine.

Holland said...

Serena: Isn't that the weirdest how the famous people come out of the woodwork after people like you and me (actually Ily) have a few Aaah.. the two birds and a stone... now there is a

Annie: That must be a

FireB: Now Bees make sense... in a way... but still why catch them in honey? The bees get all sticky and then what? lol

LLCJ: You have not lived if you have not seen Elvis... either before or after a drink... lol

Ricardo said...

She is too fixated on that man I tell you.

Holland said...

Ricardo: Yes, she is... sometimes.. well whenever she thinks of